So, i haven’t been blogging these few days… It seems like i have lost the drive to do so or maybe i just find nothing interesting to blog about. But, now i have.

While i was handling all my documents mailed to me for the admission for my poly, i came across this section: FEES. maaan. I dreaded reading through it. Why? Because the fee is so fucking high and my mum is going to use her CPF to pay my school fees and, i have to pay her back the amount that she used to pay for my school fees. The repaying starts when i leave poly and there will be a 2.5% p.a. interest on the amount for me to put back into her CPF account. Wow, i guess it’s nearly $8000 +/- without interest. And nope, my father isn’t going to pay for my school fees. Oh well, how great, i am going to pay for my school fees already. Not for the moment though, but soon, 3 years down the road and there will be a debt i have to pay and i don’t even know if i am working or going to university. So that’s it, money problem(just the starting), or maybe i am just thinking too far ahead. I should think about how am i going to handle my studies first, shouldn’t I? But, i think i should start a monthly saving from my allowance to at least prepare myself for the future. At least a small head start, better than nothing. yea..

So hopefully i am able to find a stable job be it after completing my diploma or after getting my degree. However, that breeds a new problem for me, at least. That’s entering the real adult stage after employment. Real problem, at least for me. Yea, i know alot of teenagers out there are dieing to turn adult. Woo! FREEDOM! That’s the word, i guess, that makes shallow thinking teenagers wanting to turn adult. But, little did they know that turning adults means more responsibility and more problems involving relationships, friendships, kinship, finances and etc.

Friendship problems: I don’t know how bad is it going to go, but definitely i am going to lose friends in the process of turning adult and entering the working world, although i don’t want it to happen, but i am pretty sure it would be the case. Like friends turning against one another because of competition in job, i might say. Or simply, we are just too caught up money chasing that we forget our friendships- Friendships that were built so many years ago during the innocent times of our lives.

Relationship problems: Much to come especially after marriage. Haha. I don’t think i wanna elaborate more because it’s sounds silly, i think.

Financial problems: Woo… definitely a much worse senerio than the poly case after adult stage. Bills bills bills, according to Destiny Child. Yea, i agree with them. Too many bills too little money that’s what i fear. Phone bills, credit card bills, electricity bills and more of which i can’t think of it now. Other than bills, i have to give my folks money. Yea, i know i shouldn’t be saying that as a problem but still that’s a part of my salary to them for the years of bringing up. So there you go, my folks gives me problem too. :/

Gosh! That’s so many bloody problems and some of which i have yet to And who knows, quarter life crisis might fall upon ourselves. Choy! I know. All those problems, i don’t know how am i going to juggle all at once in the future. Hopefully i will find a way.

Post-script: If i sounded too naggy or ranty or old, pardon me. I am just letting the sadness within me out. The sadness for I leaving behind my teenager hood and moving forward, towards something unappreciated by myself or at least that’s what I think now. No wonder mama always says turning adult isn’t a very good thing if you think.